Three years ago today.

“The more you love your decisions, the less you need others to love them.” (unknown)

Three years ago today, Miles entered into my life. Over the past several years, I’ve struggled to keep up with all of my passions with photography, cooking, running, and getting back into shape on this blog as I entered into the realm of motherhood

I’ve shared the ups, the downs, and in-between of my experiences and many of Miles’ enjoyable moments openly, with some inner conflict. As Miles has grown, I’ve realized how much less I want to share his amazing comedic timing, or the silly things he chooses to do as a child. I feel a sense of responsibility to allow him this time to explore without his life being on display, for-potentially-ever on the internets; searchable when he’s ninety-five and working on his retirement career.

I’ve chosen to write less about his life and growth this past year, as I feel now the choices should be up to him to share in the future as he sees fit (and we’ll teach him about that when the time comes). He cracks us up, he drives us batty, and he takes us for a ride on a daily basis. I may not always make the best decisions, but this is one I’m starting to really like; giving him the freedom to be captured in our hearts, not always on camera or published online.

This past month, I’m not sure I’ve taken more than a few photos. Gone are the days of hundreds of images, or thousands in my LR catalog at the end of the year. I’m trying to savor more of the present, while focusing on the future.

I haven’t been writing much, as there hasn’t been much to share. I’m still in the throws of morning sickness at almost 17 weeks now, which I experienced through 20 weeks with Miles. I’m somewhat exhausted, though I can peel myself off the couch now and then to get outside for fresh air with the baby guy.

Cooking seems to be a hit or miss thing these days, as I have little desire to eat, create, or make meals. On occasion, I’ve felt a burst of excitement or energy to make something new, but those days are still a bit of a ways into the future. Even foods I’ve always loved have just become banal to my palate.

Exercise has been a love/hate relationship. Weeks ago, when attempting to workout through the utter exhaustion, I would find some peace from the nausea only to return home barely able to move, and sicker than ever. It wasn’t worth the effort most days, that hour of inner peace, for it all came back with a vengeance.

I’m starting to feel a bit better with exercising again, sticking with weight lifting and the elliptical, but most days with our schedules, I’ve put it aside to get other things done. As the weather warms, I know I’ll be outdoors more with Miles at the playground and walking Ruby (she’s loving the warmer temps!).

That’s where things stand. Not much to speak of, other than loving my career again, and trying to make it through the days and weeks of pregnancy (it’s not my favorite experience as it is for so many others). We’re very much looking forward to finding out what addition will enter into our lives this year, too!

As always, I’m looking to stay healthier this go around and find that joy for photography, writing, and cooking again as well. In the coming weeks, when the energy reveals itself and my passions return or redefine themselves, I’m sure you’ll see more excitement on the blog.

Happy Birthday, my little baby guy! It’s going to be a fun day of activities with Momm-a and Daddy today 🙂 I’m not sure who is more excited 😀 but I cannot wait to see how much more you change in the coming year!

– kate –