Eventually I’ll get to rest again, in a decade or so.

I’m a photographer, but I haven’t been taking any photos; even on my iPod! I have just been experiencing life a bit more, but I always feel obligated to share a photo when I write. Therefore, I haven’t written much, because I feel bad posting without a photo. Bummer. I hope you don’t mind if I write without images now and again, though everything is prettier with a picture.

This week is a busy one. We were out on Sunday, which led to getting a bit behind on getting prepared for the week ahead; i.e. lunches are on the fly this week – cheese or PB sandwich anyone? Our weekends always seem to be full of running around these days, so we’re hoping to slow it down a bit and get in regular family time to settle into a routine of sorts before number two arrives and said routine is blown out of the water.

If anything, I just need to rest a bit more… I’ve been in overdrive in all areas and it’s really catching up to me. I did my workouts and walking last week, but I was wiped out by weeks end literally back to square one. Argh.

Some days I ask Chris, will I ever be normal again? He chirps back, was I ever normal, to begin with… Ha. I feel like I’ve been pregnant for years. I’ve forgotten what it is like to not be exhausted day in and day out, with a girth that makes reaching my toes difficult. I’m almost 23 weeks and finally – yes finally – morning sickness has started to dissipate; though it likes to chime in every now and again. I had the lovely all-day sickness that they fake for mornings with Miles through 20 weeks or so, and I think this one is out to get me…

Poor Ruby started to get sick on Saturday night, coughing and having breathing problems. I gave it a day, thinking maybe it was allergies (we were out all day for the nice day), but it didn’t seem to stop. So, after a second sleepless night Sunday, I brought her to the vet on Monday for a full check-up, tests, and meds. No exact diagnosis, but major issues have been ruled out, so it’s just meds and keeping an eye on things. She seems to be breathing better, with an occasional cough, but last night she was up for hours coughing and I just sat with her. Ah, no sleep already… too soon too soon!

Today and tomorrow I have the pleasure of attending the New Jersey Librarian Association’s Annual Conference. It’s nearby, which is awesome, and I get to learn and catch up with old colleagues from around the state. Lunch today was with a few awesome librarians I haven’t seen in six or seven years! Just like old times.

It’s nice sometimes to be an attendee instead of always a presenter or teacher. A lot of what I do professionally these days (which I do love) is presenting and teaching others technology, research, or other exciting things. Every once in awhile, it’s great to sit back and not be on the spot… but while I’m sitting there I feel the urge to put in to present next time. I’ll probably get in more presentations in 2016 across conferences. While pregnant, it’s just awkward as people follow my belly around, ha. And I hate presenting when I constantly sound out of breath; it takes a lot out of you.

I’m working on letting go of who I used to be, and accept that I’m yet again morphing into something else: mom of two, runner, maybe not a runner, long distance, maybe not, foodie, maybe not… This year is so overwhelming with the changes in life (jobs, family, new house) that I’m just hanging in there and I’m just going to keep moving forward one step at a time or one day at a time. A lot is out of my control, and maybe that’s my lesson this year – let it go, let it go… and trust in my faith.

Oh, and my red raspberry leaf tea just arrived (excellent for pregnancy/birth – I drank all throughout with Miles). Thank goodness! And I’ve ordered new protein powder, as well as picked up teeny tiny cups of ice cream to slow down the calorie intake and expenditure of recent runs to the ice cream store 🙂

Eventually, I’ll get to rest again, in a decade or so. It’s worth it for these little monsters, but man, I am no happy glowing pregnant lady. I can deal with being tired or sore from workouts, but when I’ve got a little guy sucking the life out of me from the inside and another on the out; whew it’s a day to day battle. Having number two is no joke when number one is running around… there is no rest for the weary 🙂

Have a nice week, I’ll be back next time I have a moment to sit still. Time to make a cup of tea (Chris is the best at it).

– kate –